The other day a female sent a forward to this particular listserve that I'm on to give the ladies a laugh for the day. Her e-mail is listed below.
Men are like....
1. Men are like...Bananas ...The older they get, less firm they are.
2. Men are like...Weather...Nothing can be done to change them.
3. Men are like...Chocolate Bars...Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
4. Men are like....Commercials...You can't believe a word they say.
5. Men are like...Department Stores...Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
6. Men are like...Government Bonds...They take so long to mature.
7. Men are like...Mascara...They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
8. Men are like...Popcorn...They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
9. Men are like...Snowstorms...You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
10. Men are like...Lava Lamps...Fun to look at, but not very bright.
11. Men are like...Parking Spots...All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.
Now, I laughed my ass off after reading this e-mail. However, I said to myself that the women can't take a cheap shot at us like that without a rebuttal. So, my boy on the same listserve beat me to the punch and brought some fire with an answer.
Women are like....
1. Women are like...the stock market...They're irrational and can bankrupt you if you're not careful.
2. Women are like...computers...They take too long to warm up and a better model always comes along once you've already got one.
3. Women are like...Saran Wrap...Useful but clingy.
4. Women are like...horses...Fun to pet and ride but a pain to feed and clean up after.
5. Women are like...parking meters...If you don't feed them with enough money you face serious consequences.
6. Women are like...fax machines...Useful for one very specific purpose but otherwise just high-maintenance paperweights.
7. Women are like...political campaign contributors... If you let them talk about themselves long enough you wind up in bed with them.
8. Women are like...refrigerators...They're always cold and never seem to have a beer when you need one.
9. Women are like...blue jeans...They look good for a while but eventually they fade and have to be replaced.
10.Women are like...country western songs...They're annoying, they all sound alike, but if you really listen to them you'll get depressed and drink a lot.
11. Women are like tornadoes...They both moan like hell when they come and take the house when they leave.
So, who won the battle?
What would you add to this list?
12 comments:
I resent # 6 and 9 on the women are like list. We are very useful (and for more than one purpose, and not a purpose that involves our bodies). And some people choose not to replace their women
on the women's list, #3 & 6 are conflicting..and if we were only useful for ONE thing, we couldn't do our hair, get dressed, wash, dry and iron MEN'S funky clothes, get the kids ready, cook dinner........etc. nonetheless, i would say men are like credit cards...great at first...but usually have wack ass limits that f*ck up the flow (especially when shopping)!!!!! "how much is that?" "how much longer are we gonna be here?" "how many pairs of shoes could one person have?" "i don't have anymore money"-BOO!!!!
I am not about to do myself in by cosigning any of this LoL. But I will say I laughed, almost out loud LoL.
@Cnel...you are soft like a muffin...stick up for your gender. lmao
Whoeva put together the women's list ....sound like he's been through some thangs....LOL
Dat joint was too funny from Stock Market down.
I might have to hand these out to my friends. These are hilarious. I dont think I will show them to my female friends though. They may get a lil pissed
@j.montez....yeah my boy had me rolling with his rebuttal...he did this in like 5 minutes after the e-mail was sent too...
@epsilonicus...a little pissed? They may not talk to you again if you sent them the WOMEN ARE LIKE...bit. It would be worth the laugh for me.
SChrist I resent the implication, but I must also not burn my bridges, or bite the hand that might very well feed me. I'm still going to need someone to come home to, a brother needs some support some time.
"@Cnel...you are soft like a muffin...stick up for your gender. lmao"
whatever, it will turn from a dry season to a dry decade with some mess like that.
"I must also not burn my bridges, or bite the hand that might very well feed me. I'm still going to need someone to come home to, a brother needs some support some time."
Exactly!!! Jokes are fun, but believing that stuff and quoting it on a daily basis will leave you alone, cold and hungry, LOL.
@journiemajor..."whatever, it will turn from a dry season to a dry decade with some mess like that."
No drought here...at least not in 2006...(big grin).
@Cnel...you're still my boy but that was a tissue-like explanation...in my humble opinion.
@MissA...you sound like a shop-a-holic. lmao
lol @both lists. sp how you gon allude to the end of the drought and we have gotten NO details of this alleged windfall.
@jameil...I'm a gentleman all the way...so what I've done behind closed doors...STAYS BEHIND CLOSED DOORS. Besides...the person that made me grin...reads the blog now.
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